Equal Strokes for Equal Folks
The other day a DJ on the morning show referred to a female as a “girl” who worked at a local gym. I noticed this as a common occurrence when he referenced women. I have yet to hear him refer to a member of the male species as a “boy” in an adult work situation. And…
He is not alone.
With the stroke of a pen and a flick of the tongue, influencers — such as DJs, podcasters, speakers, managers, and even coworkers — insist that “girls will be girls and boys will be men.” Really?
Really. To help him and all of us, I decided to build a table with the male and female counterparts. In my life, everyone one is equal. Kudos to Microsoft Office for recommending inclusive language when writing in Word.
To help remove bias speak, I offer the following tables.
Male | Female | Neutral | Gender Inclusive |
Boy | Girl | Child |
Man | Woman | Person | Individual | Adult |
Guy | Gal | Person | Individual |
Gentleman | Lady | Honorable- People | Person | Individual |
Dear Sir | Dear Madam | Ma’am | To Whom It May Concern | Dear Member/Chair | Dear Editor |
Mr. | Ms. | Mx. |
Husband | Wife | Spouse |
Father | Mother | Parent |
Brother | Sister | Sibling |
Househusband | Housewife | Homemaker | Stay-at-home parent |
Actor | Actress | Actor |
Chairman | Chairwoman | Chair | Chairperson | Coordinator | Head | Lead |
Congressman | Congress woman | Representative | Senator Congressional Representative | Legislator |
Male Doctor | Female Doctor | Doctor |
Doorman | Doorwoman | Door Attendant |
Mailman | Mailwoman | Mail Carrier | Letter Carrier | Postal Worker |
Policeman | Policewoman | Police Officer |
Fireman | Firewoman | Firefighter |
Steward | Stewardess | Flight Attendant |
Waiter | Waitress | Server |
He | She | They |
Him | Her | Them |
His | Hers | Theirs |
Mankind | Manhood | Womankind | Womanhood | People | Humans | humankind | Humanity |
Our language, and the words we choose to communicate, must reflect respect — even more so in the workplace. Equality starts with you. Words hold power; let’s use them wisely. To that end, please check out some rules I have found to further help you communicate better.
Inclusion and Acceptance
While taking harassment training at Quinnipiac University in April of 2019, I realized I had a few more descriptors to add to the list above. These are gender inclusive.
In the table below, I included words that demonstrate kindness towards people who may be different from us — or towards ourselves if it describes us.
My good friend transformed within a 60-day period — from walking normally to now using a wheelchair — and now a motorized wheelchair. It’s been a shock on us all. After my training, I changed my language use from “confined to a wheelchair” to “using a wheelchair.” I feel better knowing how to phrase her story with kindness when people ask me.
Offensive | Preferred |
Disabled | Person with a disability |
Dyslexic | Person with dyslexia |
Confined to a wheelchair | Person who uses a wheelchair |
Homosexual | Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender LGBT (Q at the end represents “queer” or “questioning) |
Sexual Preference | Orientation |
This table can be expanded considerably when you check out the Society of Professional Journalists’ Diversity Style Guide. It also includes detailed lists for a kinder and gentler approach to communicating.
Another great reference article by Nehemiah Green I found recently comes from my Medium subscription. I recommend you read 70 Inclusive Language Principles That Will Make You A More Successful Recruiter (Part 1) and follow on to Part 2.
Race related writing
I decided to write a separate post referencing “race” in your story. Check out my AP Stylebook: Resource for race-related coverage blog post for details.
I am updating this post as I gain new knowledge or hear something that I left off. I originally wrote this piece in November of 2018. Thanks for letting us be a part of your life.
Jan
P.S. Like Aretha Franklin, “All I’m askin’ here is a little respect…” (Lyrics at https://www.lyrics.com/lyric/2877312/Aretha+Franklin/Respectand song history at https://www.cbsnews.com/news/untold-history-behind-aretha-franklin-respect/)
Great reference sites for writing and speaking
Society of Professional Journalists | Diversity Style Guide http://www.diversitystyleguide.com/
North Carolina University | The Writing Center
https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/
https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/gender-inclusive-language/
Purdue | Online Writing Lab | OWL
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/general_writing/grammar/pronouns/gendered_pronouns_and_singular_they.html
Inclusion and Acceptance; check out GLAAD’s Media Guide http://www.glaad.org/sites/default/files/GLAAD-Media-Reference-Guide-Tenth-Edition.pdf
The Associated Press (AP) Stylebook https://www.apstylebook.com/
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